Oct 27 2019

All I need is someone who would hold me, hold me tight and not let go.. 

I know am strong, independent, has it all and free woman who is in her 30's and living a care free life, I bet most of my friends envy that I could do what I do..

But do you know, what I really want? The only thing I really wanted always? And never got to experience it? I never felt loved or cared for. 

I carry my own bags, I have dragged suitcases with all my dreams between cities. I went back to empty houses all my 20's and now it has become the normality. Oh yeah, I am so good and I have got myself together all the time. I haven't even fallen sick. Am that perfect for people's eyes. 

No one has any idea that I don't want to be all this. I want to be held too. I want to be cared for too. I want to go back home to someone too. I want to fall sick and nursed back to health too. I don't want to drag my suitcases alone to any other place. I can't move anymore. I don't want to be independent. I don't want to feel this extreme pain of loneliness. 

All I need is a hug, someone who would be happy to hold me, hold me tight and not let go. Can it just stop being just in my dreams and be real too ?